Three-word titles are often catchy because they never go beyond a given limit. Robert Kirkman demonstrates this principle with The Walking Dead. Why create some lengthy-ass title that no one will ever pay any mind? Instead, fashion some short-ass title that quite a few people will pay mind to all because of their very limited attention span and likelihood to stare at shiny objects.
So, my point being, the past few posts have had three-word titles. Short, catchy, to the point. That jazz.
As most of you veteran nerds may well know, Firefly, is nearing the ten-year mark come September. In commemoration of a fallen series, I implore you to help celebrate Whedon's brain-child by pulling an all-day marathon. Hopefully by doing so we'll have given proper homage to the entertainment gods and be graced with more shinies in the future.
Unless you want to jump into classic Greek tragedy or how much I hate my job, I believe now is good a time as any to conclude what probably won't be the shortest damn post ever. Consider this more as a filler between now and Tuesday.
Yes, I will be seeing The Amazing Spiderman at midnight for both my viewing pleasure and your entertainment review needs. July will definitely not let anyone down on new releases. Christopher Nolan may be the exception to that. Can you really follow up on Heath Ledger's Joker four years later? Honestly? I don't rightfully believe The Dark Knight Rises will hit the same mark The Dark Knight did back in 2008. Regardless, I'm a f*cking Batman nut, so there goes a near-future eight bucks.
Alright, class, open your books to #414- Convert one of Shakespeare's plays into either a song or musical.
Jonesy signing off.
30 June 2012
29 June 2012
RIFFS! YEAH, RIGHT!
Yes, I just watched The Warriors for the tenth time. This 1979 cult classic directed by Walter Hill simply cannot be ignored and pushed aside as a work in mediocrity. Hell, even the damn game was good. I honestly can't find any grievances anywhere throughout the film. If you haven't caught this flick yet, stop reading, find it on Youtube, Half Price Books, Amazon, I don't care. Watch it, love it, and spread the awesome.
Speaking of more recent films, no, I've yet to catch Brave, but managed to view Ted earlier today. Any and all fans of Seth MacFarlane will truly appreciate his entrance into film directing. This movie has heart, hilarity, vulgarity, and just plain damn raunchiness. MacFarlane really does bring the vibes of Family Guy into the plot and characters of Ted.
In a story of a young boy wishing his teddy bear alive, anyone with a memorable childhood will immediately connect. I mean, come on. Who wouldn't want their stuffed bear come alive over night? In a bizarre 'what-if' scenario, MacFarlane, Wahlberg, and Kunis really shine in their respective performances. Mark Wahlberg's typical roles usual toss him into the bad-ass action hero, so having a chance to play a comedy allows him a chance to break this certain type-cast. MacFarlane steals the show as the lovable title character with his Peter Griffin persona. I could not stop laughing during his scenes. The CGI used for displaying Ted was amazing. He really seemed life-like and literally present in the film rather than a graphic rendering. Kunis was the lesser of the three, but still gave it her all as the forgivable wedge between John and Ted.
Without giving too much away, Ted truly is the funniest comedy of the year thus far. Plenty of laughs that don't overstay their welcome with equal amounts heart to develop the characters and plot. For my rating, I will say this: If you love Family Guy, get off your ass and see the f*cking movie. If not, chillax on the couch and watch The Warriors.
Until then, boppers, always remember what DO you do with a BA in English? #81- Adapt Shakespeare's plays into the graphic novel format and get creative.
Stay tuned, bookworms. Stay tuned.
Speaking of more recent films, no, I've yet to catch Brave, but managed to view Ted earlier today. Any and all fans of Seth MacFarlane will truly appreciate his entrance into film directing. This movie has heart, hilarity, vulgarity, and just plain damn raunchiness. MacFarlane really does bring the vibes of Family Guy into the plot and characters of Ted.
In a story of a young boy wishing his teddy bear alive, anyone with a memorable childhood will immediately connect. I mean, come on. Who wouldn't want their stuffed bear come alive over night? In a bizarre 'what-if' scenario, MacFarlane, Wahlberg, and Kunis really shine in their respective performances. Mark Wahlberg's typical roles usual toss him into the bad-ass action hero, so having a chance to play a comedy allows him a chance to break this certain type-cast. MacFarlane steals the show as the lovable title character with his Peter Griffin persona. I could not stop laughing during his scenes. The CGI used for displaying Ted was amazing. He really seemed life-like and literally present in the film rather than a graphic rendering. Kunis was the lesser of the three, but still gave it her all as the forgivable wedge between John and Ted.
Without giving too much away, Ted truly is the funniest comedy of the year thus far. Plenty of laughs that don't overstay their welcome with equal amounts heart to develop the characters and plot. For my rating, I will say this: If you love Family Guy, get off your ass and see the f*cking movie. If not, chillax on the couch and watch The Warriors.
Until then, boppers, always remember what DO you do with a BA in English? #81- Adapt Shakespeare's plays into the graphic novel format and get creative.
Stay tuned, bookworms. Stay tuned.
24 June 2012
The Circus Afro
So, Chuck is my new favorite show. Just a shame it's over now. The show's originality caught my initial interest, but as I'm progressing through the first season, I'm finding that it's just a good show to lay back and chill. This also provides more credit to my name in the pop culture department. Upon successful completion of Chuck and Arrested Development, I will feel confident enough to finish TBBT and thus be somewhat accomplished in the past TV shows viewing effort.
I did mention in the previous entry that four movies would be viewed by the end of today, but Moonrise Kingdom was, apparently, a limited release that didn't make it to a majority of the DFW area. Same with To Rome With Love. My end result was Abe Lincoln and Madagascar 3 (not on the original list, but still worth seeing). Our famous "New York Giants" or "Giant Pansies" make the trip back to New York only to find interest in certain other passions involving tightropes, trapeze, flaming hoops, and (of course), the circus afro.
I did mention in the previous entry that four movies would be viewed by the end of today, but Moonrise Kingdom was, apparently, a limited release that didn't make it to a majority of the DFW area. Same with To Rome With Love. My end result was Abe Lincoln and Madagascar 3 (not on the original list, but still worth seeing). Our famous "New York Giants" or "Giant Pansies" make the trip back to New York only to find interest in certain other passions involving tightropes, trapeze, flaming hoops, and (of course), the circus afro.
Despite what may seem a bit ridiculous, the third entry in the series was funny to a twenty-two year-old as well as five year-olds. Plenty of heart, laughs, and moments that give credit to Dreamworks' ability to continue promoting animated films. Performances by Ben Stiller, Chris Rock, Jada Pinkett-Smith, and David Schwimmer keep up to par with the plot and audience expectations. Now, I've been watching the first film non-stop at work, so it's interesting to see how far the series has come in the past few years. As for what's next in line, I'm not entirely sure. Many animated series seem to end at the trilogy mark, so hopefully this won't be drawn out for an inordinate amount of time. Supporting performances by Martin Short as the Italian sea lion Stefano, Sacha Baron Cohen as the returning King Julien, and Bryan Cranston in a surprising role as the washed-up, self-loathing Russian Tiger, Vitaly make for both recurring and new moments throughout the film.
Ted hits theatres on Friday, 29 June which has already impressed some critics over at IGN citing Seth MacFarlane's introduction to feature-filmmaking as the "best comedy of the year". Hell, after the red band trailer, I'm willing to agree.
In the week after, The Amazing Spiderman webslings into theatres on 3 July just in time for the Fourth of July rush. Midnight showing? Hell yes. Can Marc Webb truly reinvent Spidey to appease the audiences? Perhaps, given the Lizard isn't dumb-ass looking and Stan Lee's cameo is worth remembering. As long as the ending leads into sequels, I'm down.
Stay tuned, bookworms and film buffs. Pixar's Brave just might show up here before Friday.
And, remember. Don't panic, always bring a towel, say thanks for the fish, and #308- Read through Douglas Adams' The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy while drinking the Pangalactic Gargleblaster attempting not to feel the sensation of a golden brick wrapped in lemon smashing into your head repeatedly.
Cheerio, mates.
Ted hits theatres on Friday, 29 June which has already impressed some critics over at IGN citing Seth MacFarlane's introduction to feature-filmmaking as the "best comedy of the year". Hell, after the red band trailer, I'm willing to agree.
In the week after, The Amazing Spiderman webslings into theatres on 3 July just in time for the Fourth of July rush. Midnight showing? Hell yes. Can Marc Webb truly reinvent Spidey to appease the audiences? Perhaps, given the Lizard isn't dumb-ass looking and Stan Lee's cameo is worth remembering. As long as the ending leads into sequels, I'm down.
Stay tuned, bookworms and film buffs. Pixar's Brave just might show up here before Friday.
And, remember. Don't panic, always bring a towel, say thanks for the fish, and #308- Read through Douglas Adams' The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy while drinking the Pangalactic Gargleblaster attempting not to feel the sensation of a golden brick wrapped in lemon smashing into your head repeatedly.
Cheerio, mates.
22 June 2012
The Vampire Hunter
I know reviews were promised for multiple movies this weekend, so let's start with the one you've seen litter this blog, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. Where does this rest as a film adaptation of a two year-old novel? Depends. For fairness of Grahame-Smith's work as well as audiences in general, I will compose two separate reviews based on certain criteria: one for those who read the book and have seen the film (me) and another for those who only view the film itself.
Trust me on this. Seeing particular films with friends who are unaware of the novel's material really does pay out. Two views of the same movie, yet two completely different opinions come out.
Let's begin, shall we?
Novel First, Movie After:
As you know, I read this book during the previous semester in my American Lit course. A very highly anticipated read, I began two weeks early and eventually composed an eight-page paper over the topic "Does Grahame-Smith preserve history through creativity?" Absolutely. He spared no expense researching Lincoln's life as well as events surrounding his exploits. My understanding of this material became solid and unquestionable.
Viewing Timur Bekmambetov's direction of Grahame-Smith's screenplay can only be summed up in one word: short. The novel, while somewhat lengthy at 300+ pages, never fails to extend certain plot elements. Reading the book offers the fullest experience. Now, to no surprise, Grahame-Smith wrote the screenplay as well as produced his adaptation. This can also be seen with Robert Kirkman's The Walking Dead in which the original author holds a contributing hand in the on-screen version. However, I believe this holds a certain issue. Authors of the base material feel obligated to cut out, add in, or blend scenes together which can dramatically alter the film for those who already know well their material. While I won't reveal any spoilers, be prepared to tilt/scratch your head in confusion if you've read the book. Those age-old questions "Where's this" or "What's this" comes around multiple times.
Acting stands as the film's strongest point. Benjamin Walker as Lincoln shines in the role. Absolutely incredible performance from beginning to end. Filling the shoes of Abraham Lincoln never brings an easy task, but Walker's stature combined with a strong voice gives credit to a prominent figure who's actual nature was somewhat timid.
Dominic Cooper as Henry confused me. In the book (not really a spoiler), his role resided more in the shadows leading Abe through the plot very secretively. From their initial interaction, certain "get-to-know-you" discussions, and throughout the story, Henry's friendship with Abe went through many trials which don't really translate to film well. If you're reading this and not understanding, remember, this review is for those who read the book and know what I mean.
The story, in general, deviates from the novel version almost entirely. Major events that shaped Smith's Lincoln were cut out and hardly to not even mentioned. Ann Rutledge has a "blink-or-you'll-miss-it" cameo during the Battle of Gettysburg scene. Pay very close attention and you'll see.
Overall verdict for book first, movie later: Third quarter- Think about it for a bit on the couch, then go see the damn movie. In more traditional sense: a three of five or six of ten. Adequate for comparisons between the medias, but nowhere near a faithful adaptation. This can be forgiven only when looking at the matter through a production/financial window.
Movie only:
Can't really say much without spoiling the film, so this I will say. Just watch the film, don't read the book, and go about your merry. Most likely, you're part of the bandwagon crowd that loved the AMC version of The Walking Dead rather than take the longer route to read through the entire graphic novel series and find a better, more fulfilling enjoyment.
I will include this. Should you come at an impass, choose one or the other. Enjoy one, ignore the other. I'm a part of a select group capable of discussing both in greater detail. I leave the choice for your sound mind.
As the weekend progresses, more reviews will appear for Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, Moonrise Kingdom, and Brave. Sunday should mark the completion of each review.
Until then, allow me an opportunity to burden your minds with yet another insightful view into what DO you do with a BA in English: #19- Read and/or contribute to the mash-up/mutant genre that is quickly sweeping the globe. It's fun, entertaining, and educational!
Jonesy signing off to hunt down some vampires.
Trust me on this. Seeing particular films with friends who are unaware of the novel's material really does pay out. Two views of the same movie, yet two completely different opinions come out.
Let's begin, shall we?
Novel First, Movie After:
As you know, I read this book during the previous semester in my American Lit course. A very highly anticipated read, I began two weeks early and eventually composed an eight-page paper over the topic "Does Grahame-Smith preserve history through creativity?" Absolutely. He spared no expense researching Lincoln's life as well as events surrounding his exploits. My understanding of this material became solid and unquestionable.
Viewing Timur Bekmambetov's direction of Grahame-Smith's screenplay can only be summed up in one word: short. The novel, while somewhat lengthy at 300+ pages, never fails to extend certain plot elements. Reading the book offers the fullest experience. Now, to no surprise, Grahame-Smith wrote the screenplay as well as produced his adaptation. This can also be seen with Robert Kirkman's The Walking Dead in which the original author holds a contributing hand in the on-screen version. However, I believe this holds a certain issue. Authors of the base material feel obligated to cut out, add in, or blend scenes together which can dramatically alter the film for those who already know well their material. While I won't reveal any spoilers, be prepared to tilt/scratch your head in confusion if you've read the book. Those age-old questions "Where's this" or "What's this" comes around multiple times.
Acting stands as the film's strongest point. Benjamin Walker as Lincoln shines in the role. Absolutely incredible performance from beginning to end. Filling the shoes of Abraham Lincoln never brings an easy task, but Walker's stature combined with a strong voice gives credit to a prominent figure who's actual nature was somewhat timid.
Dominic Cooper as Henry confused me. In the book (not really a spoiler), his role resided more in the shadows leading Abe through the plot very secretively. From their initial interaction, certain "get-to-know-you" discussions, and throughout the story, Henry's friendship with Abe went through many trials which don't really translate to film well. If you're reading this and not understanding, remember, this review is for those who read the book and know what I mean.
The story, in general, deviates from the novel version almost entirely. Major events that shaped Smith's Lincoln were cut out and hardly to not even mentioned. Ann Rutledge has a "blink-or-you'll-miss-it" cameo during the Battle of Gettysburg scene. Pay very close attention and you'll see.
Overall verdict for book first, movie later: Third quarter- Think about it for a bit on the couch, then go see the damn movie. In more traditional sense: a three of five or six of ten. Adequate for comparisons between the medias, but nowhere near a faithful adaptation. This can be forgiven only when looking at the matter through a production/financial window.
Movie only:
Can't really say much without spoiling the film, so this I will say. Just watch the film, don't read the book, and go about your merry. Most likely, you're part of the bandwagon crowd that loved the AMC version of The Walking Dead rather than take the longer route to read through the entire graphic novel series and find a better, more fulfilling enjoyment.
I will include this. Should you come at an impass, choose one or the other. Enjoy one, ignore the other. I'm a part of a select group capable of discussing both in greater detail. I leave the choice for your sound mind.
As the weekend progresses, more reviews will appear for Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, Moonrise Kingdom, and Brave. Sunday should mark the completion of each review.
Until then, allow me an opportunity to burden your minds with yet another insightful view into what DO you do with a BA in English: #19- Read and/or contribute to the mash-up/mutant genre that is quickly sweeping the globe. It's fun, entertaining, and educational!
Jonesy signing off to hunt down some vampires.
21 June 2012
Three Little Words
I. Am. Done.....with my fifth short essay, that is. Normally, I'm extending my written efforts well into the night, but for some strange damn reason, I finished half an hour before midnight. Funny part about this whole deal:
I wrote over Plato's Euthyphro and how Epicurus ties into a fictionalized Socrates. Simply put, I took maxim #65 "It is pointless for a man to pray to the gods for that which he has the power to obtain by himself". Yes, of course, explanation. Like I said, quite simple.
Mankind, over the centuries, has always invented some religious deity for societies to worship. Fortunately, there are certain individuals within those cultures who believe a little idea I like to call "self-service". My question to you is exactly identical to Epicurus: Why waste time praying to whatever when you can just as easily perform the duties yourself? Example: You pray to God for an A in Calculus. Wouldn't you much rather study intensively and earn the grade to call it your own? Don't thank God for good fortune, thank yourself instead because it came from the actions you performed. Never sell yourself short in the name of an unproved deity. Ever notice how religion is nothing but hearsay? Think about it.
Anyway, back to the news that's new and improved. Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Brave, Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, and many others hit theatres in ONE DAY!!!!!!!!!! You can tell I'm excited, right? Right?!?!?! Just say yes and drink the damn Kool-Aid.
Critics have slammed Honest Axe-wielding Abe which royally pisses me off. Doesn't help these critics were from the UK. 1) Different culture, different history over here, 2) American authors write slightly different than British. Always have, always will. 3) After Twilight, the world deserves a better rendition of vampiric lore. As I've said before. Read the book thoroughly and watch the movie to enjoy the mash-up shiny.
Movies dominate this summer season. Expect a drastic shift in focus starting in September when Borderlands II makes landfall. We've still got Ted, The Amazing Spiderman, and The Dark Knight Rises in our near future.
Random tangent: Shouldn't this be The Dark Knight Falls? This IS Bane we're talking about here. You know. The hyped-up-on-Titan luchador with a hell-bent desire to wreak mayhem on Bruce Wayne/Batman. I mean, come on! He broke the Bat! If we're going to get deep on this, he "made God bleed" for those of you who remember Whiplash's line in Iron Man II. This is why I love Arkham Asylum and City. I get to see the Batman universe I know and adore. Speaking of Batman......Lego Batman II is finally available. Now, I like what Traveler's Tales has done with LEGOs, but now.......damn. This will be an entry I'm certain to buy full retail possibly today. I won't reveal anything, but please, please, please, don't pass this title.
And that, mes amis, is all I have to say about that because there's a day off to be had in which I have no damn worries of any sort. For instance: #88- Shake your writing style up to hopefully appease your Lit professor who probably despises your feeble attempts to write up to his standards. You'll actually worry less about writing said paper!
For tonight, this is Jonesy signing off.
I wrote over Plato's Euthyphro and how Epicurus ties into a fictionalized Socrates. Simply put, I took maxim #65 "It is pointless for a man to pray to the gods for that which he has the power to obtain by himself". Yes, of course, explanation. Like I said, quite simple.
Mankind, over the centuries, has always invented some religious deity for societies to worship. Fortunately, there are certain individuals within those cultures who believe a little idea I like to call "self-service". My question to you is exactly identical to Epicurus: Why waste time praying to whatever when you can just as easily perform the duties yourself? Example: You pray to God for an A in Calculus. Wouldn't you much rather study intensively and earn the grade to call it your own? Don't thank God for good fortune, thank yourself instead because it came from the actions you performed. Never sell yourself short in the name of an unproved deity. Ever notice how religion is nothing but hearsay? Think about it.
Anyway, back to the news that's new and improved. Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Brave, Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, and many others hit theatres in ONE DAY!!!!!!!!!! You can tell I'm excited, right? Right?!?!?! Just say yes and drink the damn Kool-Aid.
Critics have slammed Honest Axe-wielding Abe which royally pisses me off. Doesn't help these critics were from the UK. 1) Different culture, different history over here, 2) American authors write slightly different than British. Always have, always will. 3) After Twilight, the world deserves a better rendition of vampiric lore. As I've said before. Read the book thoroughly and watch the movie to enjoy the mash-up shiny.
Movies dominate this summer season. Expect a drastic shift in focus starting in September when Borderlands II makes landfall. We've still got Ted, The Amazing Spiderman, and The Dark Knight Rises in our near future.
Random tangent: Shouldn't this be The Dark Knight Falls? This IS Bane we're talking about here. You know. The hyped-up-on-Titan luchador with a hell-bent desire to wreak mayhem on Bruce Wayne/Batman. I mean, come on! He broke the Bat! If we're going to get deep on this, he "made God bleed" for those of you who remember Whiplash's line in Iron Man II. This is why I love Arkham Asylum and City. I get to see the Batman universe I know and adore. Speaking of Batman......Lego Batman II is finally available. Now, I like what Traveler's Tales has done with LEGOs, but now.......damn. This will be an entry I'm certain to buy full retail possibly today. I won't reveal anything, but please, please, please, don't pass this title.
And that, mes amis, is all I have to say about that because there's a day off to be had in which I have no damn worries of any sort. For instance: #88- Shake your writing style up to hopefully appease your Lit professor who probably despises your feeble attempts to write up to his standards. You'll actually worry less about writing said paper!
For tonight, this is Jonesy signing off.
19 June 2012
Just One Word
Ambition
What is life outside the confines of a parent's dominion? I've never the chance to bask in this sweet, liberating glory with only an annoying landlord demanding next month's rent at the beginning of the current. Must my creativity be stifled under such a tyrannical regime? Yes, I admit dyeing my hair dark red or any other color might be a fool's folly, yet how the hell will I ever know my definition of life if I'm not willing to define it?
Granted, by remaining steady in my education, I removed work from a full-time status, thus preventing a more higher source of income. In this pursuit, however, my chances for a job more suitable than f*cking retail climb exponentially.
College students: Don't let anyone tell you a degree isn't worth your time. Fight for an education as you would for a woman. Fight with pride, dignity, knowledge, and serenity. Find your goal and NEVER back down.
I cannot stress the above enough. This blog mainly focuses on pop culture and American society, but tonight, this gets real. I dial back on the bullshit temporarily to introduce a shred of insight for those in dire need of inspiration. Take this lesson from me. Your college career defines who you are. Each class taken, each new person met, and each bit of knowledge learned shapes the person you wish to become. Change universities, change majors, change the way you write, talk, walk, act. Do whatever it takes to earn a degree (within reason, of course. I deny all accusations levied upon me from here on out).
Yes, people have led successful lives without a college education, but think about this: Do you want to do what they do? Suppose they're an entrepreneur. A mechanic. Inventor. These people found goals in their strengths which might not be yours. Find what it is in life you desire and have at it. Be a doctor, an archaeologist, a lawyer, director, teacher, researcher. I don't care. Never settle for less than what you're capable of doing. Live a life comparable to that of three, five, ten, twenty, hell, one hundred! Do something extraordinary for yourself or others. Succeed for the benefits of a greater good.
I know my calling. Reading, writing, listening, speaking. Living. Cultural studies. Foreign languages. Strange, but interesting traditions and customs. Exotic landscapes. Breath-taking sights. I mean the experiences of traveling. My ambition breaches through that of a normal man's. I cannot begin to imagine the restrictions of an office environment that isn't either IGN or Game Informer. What I can picture are the photographs taken by my Nikon D3100. The words written regarding recent experiences wherever my adventures take me. The people I share encounters with. The one true love I share my life with. Alright, that last one was me getting a little soft.
Who doesn't dream of a life this grand? I want this, nay, I deserve this after all the effort I've given. I deserve this life because I know I can attain that life. My skills, my knowledge, my ambition to keep learning will take me directly to these opportunities. Vigilance, perseverance, dedication, devotion, and (above all) patience guides man along the correct path.
And, without further ado, I present to you another brilliant idea of what DO you do with a BA in English: #492- Ask Grecians about Euripides' Aeschylus, Plato, and various other ancient Greek authors just to see how much they know about their history.
Jonesy signing off to read more Plato...
15 June 2012
An Empty Glass
I propose this maxim after spending yesterday and today working outside under a harsh sun:
"Give the son an axe, a shovel, a trowel, and a chainsaw and he will do hard work."
When you're faced with stump removal in climates upward to ninety-five to one-hundred plus degrees, the likelihood of accomplishing any work slightly diminishes minute-by-minute. In the same event, if your tools consist of any of the above mentioned, weather be damned. Negotiating with foliage remnants with extreme prejudice (and by that, I mean a gas-powered chainsaw)just becomes so f*cking awesome. We've all come across the moment in Doom 3 when we finally get our hands on the coveted Bucky chainsaw. Toss those cheat codes in and the game becomes a downward roller coaster ride of demonic pacification. Years after tearing through Hell's hordes with my precious saw, I put those skills to good use. Of course, maniacal laughter becomes a must whilst sawing through organic material......don't take that out of context. This isn't a murderous declaration of intent. Just a factual account of a first-time chainsaw experience.
Now, as to matters pertaining the entertainment society, this week's box office release were a handful of hit-and-misses. That's My Boy and Rock of Ages released today amidst a sea of negativity. While I've not the chance to view either film, these come down to preference. Sandler fans will flock while true fans of his earlier works might turn a blind eye. As for a rock-and-roll themed musical, I honestly can't and won't say anything against until a viewing has occurred. Granted, Detroit Rock City wasn't a musical and focused on one primary band (KISS, of course), I feel like this can act as a decent basis to judge Rock of Ages. Think about it: you have two groups. One maintains a deep appreciation for the music while another protests against it. Both sides encounter each other at some point in the film to exchange ideals. I can only go so far until actually seeing the movie which will most likely occur given the film's ensemble cast.
Next week carries some boastful entries all releasing 22 June.
1) Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
2) Pixar's Brave
3) Seeking a Friend for the End of the World
4) To Rome with Love
All four equally deserve serious attention. Hopefully, I can score a second day off and enjoy a movie marathon. There's one film in particular, Safety not Guaranteed, that slipped under the radar last week. Naturally, most independent films appear at Sundance, Cannes, or the Indie Film Fest, but rarely make it to a nation-wide release. Hell, I haven't even seen the damn trailer to this, but I'd be willing to drive as far as Austin if it meant a chance to view (keep in mind, I live in Lewisville. We're talking a five-six-seven hour drive). This point I cannot stress enough. Appreciate the effort of indie filmmakers and their contributions. These genius minds strive to support traditional methods of filmmaking by removing audience expectations like ridiculous explosions or unnecessary action. Instead, they focus on plot developments, character building, and a thoroughly satisfying denouement. Intrigue behind these films becomes almost instant. Words can be spoken in whisper, yet news of these cinematic art pieces will sneak out into the public.
UPDATE: Only two theatres in the Dallas/Ft Worth area have showings. Cinemark in Plano and the Angelika Theatre in Dallas. This is like The Artist all over again. Damn you, limited release films!!!!!!!!! You draw me in, yet don't let me see you!!!!!!! If a theatre nearby has showings, don't pass this up. Don't ignore my pleas. And certainly, don't spoil the film until I've seen it.
In other news, Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows will fall into my hands very soon. We'll see how the master detective fairs on blu-ray/digital download. Alternate scenes would be interesting.
Thus ends a film nut's discussion.
An empty glass.
A vacant space.
An empty glass.
Number nine- Turn your favorite film into a novel adaptation or vice versa. Go nuts with the ideas.
Jonesy signing off.
"Give the son an axe, a shovel, a trowel, and a chainsaw and he will do hard work."
When you're faced with stump removal in climates upward to ninety-five to one-hundred plus degrees, the likelihood of accomplishing any work slightly diminishes minute-by-minute. In the same event, if your tools consist of any of the above mentioned, weather be damned. Negotiating with foliage remnants with extreme prejudice (and by that, I mean a gas-powered chainsaw)just becomes so f*cking awesome. We've all come across the moment in Doom 3 when we finally get our hands on the coveted Bucky chainsaw. Toss those cheat codes in and the game becomes a downward roller coaster ride of demonic pacification. Years after tearing through Hell's hordes with my precious saw, I put those skills to good use. Of course, maniacal laughter becomes a must whilst sawing through organic material......don't take that out of context. This isn't a murderous declaration of intent. Just a factual account of a first-time chainsaw experience.
Now, as to matters pertaining the entertainment society, this week's box office release were a handful of hit-and-misses. That's My Boy and Rock of Ages released today amidst a sea of negativity. While I've not the chance to view either film, these come down to preference. Sandler fans will flock while true fans of his earlier works might turn a blind eye. As for a rock-and-roll themed musical, I honestly can't and won't say anything against until a viewing has occurred. Granted, Detroit Rock City wasn't a musical and focused on one primary band (KISS, of course), I feel like this can act as a decent basis to judge Rock of Ages. Think about it: you have two groups. One maintains a deep appreciation for the music while another protests against it. Both sides encounter each other at some point in the film to exchange ideals. I can only go so far until actually seeing the movie which will most likely occur given the film's ensemble cast.
Next week carries some boastful entries all releasing 22 June.
1) Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
2) Pixar's Brave
3) Seeking a Friend for the End of the World
4) To Rome with Love
All four equally deserve serious attention. Hopefully, I can score a second day off and enjoy a movie marathon. There's one film in particular, Safety not Guaranteed, that slipped under the radar last week. Naturally, most independent films appear at Sundance, Cannes, or the Indie Film Fest, but rarely make it to a nation-wide release. Hell, I haven't even seen the damn trailer to this, but I'd be willing to drive as far as Austin if it meant a chance to view (keep in mind, I live in Lewisville. We're talking a five-six-seven hour drive). This point I cannot stress enough. Appreciate the effort of indie filmmakers and their contributions. These genius minds strive to support traditional methods of filmmaking by removing audience expectations like ridiculous explosions or unnecessary action. Instead, they focus on plot developments, character building, and a thoroughly satisfying denouement. Intrigue behind these films becomes almost instant. Words can be spoken in whisper, yet news of these cinematic art pieces will sneak out into the public.
UPDATE: Only two theatres in the Dallas/Ft Worth area have showings. Cinemark in Plano and the Angelika Theatre in Dallas. This is like The Artist all over again. Damn you, limited release films!!!!!!!!! You draw me in, yet don't let me see you!!!!!!! If a theatre nearby has showings, don't pass this up. Don't ignore my pleas. And certainly, don't spoil the film until I've seen it.
In other news, Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows will fall into my hands very soon. We'll see how the master detective fairs on blu-ray/digital download. Alternate scenes would be interesting.
Thus ends a film nut's discussion.
An empty glass.
A vacant space.
An empty glass.
Number nine- Turn your favorite film into a novel adaptation or vice versa. Go nuts with the ideas.
Jonesy signing off.
12 June 2012
The Romance Query and Expiration Dates
In summation of the earlier posed experiment (which has come to a satisfactory conclusion despite the projected date), I can thoroughly claim reasonable evidence behind my intentions. Basically, the experiment consisted of the alteration of my social networking status to "in a relationship" to gauge the response of "supposed" friends who know mere fractions of an individual I call myself.
When I find sufficient entrance into a particular bond known as the relationship, my history as a heavily opinionated, talkative, self-proclaimed Grammar Nazi who consistently hits the mark pissing off individuals in possession of poor grammar/punctuation will tell most that I will, indeed, inform them of a change in relation status not involving the digital transfer of information. I don't oppose the social institution of the relationship. My understanding of the vast complexities prevents such interactions from occurring. Such factors contributing to said prevention have often included introverted adolescent behavior, the constant desire to remain one of the more highly educated individuals within the classroom environment as to appease moral and educational norms, and the rejection from members of the opposite gender.
Given my record of academia, these relationships never collaborated well with regularly set study habits. I digress, however, and call a vote to change subject.
No objections to the vote?
Motion agreed and shall sally forth to more entertaining endeavors!
I would recommend Rock of Ages as it both combines classic rock with the musical which, when studded with an all-star cast, must at least be valued for cheap, eight-dollar entertainment. 15 June brings about yet another attempt for Adam Sandler to devour his career with That's My Boy. Andy Samberg's purpose in this film must be nothing other than trying to hold up some integrity while Sandler makes an ass out of himself AGAIN. Cross-dressing and dumping Brooklyn Decker's ass for Jennifer Aniston wasn't enough? Now you have to use that f*cking annoying voice used so very sparingly throughout previous films? WHY?! I get it. Younger actors have risen to replace you, but retain some honor and go down peacefully. We all honestly thought Funny People meant the intended "bowing out" of the film industry, but now you want to make Tonka truck movies? F*ck that noise. Transformers was enough to see, Battleship made no other sense than a money grab, and Tonka trucks just has to be a last-ditch effort. Sandler, you WERE funny, hilarious, and a decent actor. BACK IN THE NINETIES! And early 2000s. Actors, just like milk, have expiration dates.
I really must put an end to these senseless rants of opinion.
On the bright side, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is nearly a week away. [Insert smiley emoticon now]
Or not. Anyway, the realism behind this film carries zero short-comings even to those not versed in Seth Grahame-Smith's narrative style. I do recommend reading the book. I do recommend seeing the movie. In fact, I can already award my rating of : Get the f*ck off the couch and see this damn movie! Of course, when I see the film from beginning to end, a review will follow as expected.
Count sheep tonight whilst imagining what DO you do with a BA in English such as #33- Assist the revival/teaching of poetry as a verifiable source of art.
Jonesy going to sleep.
When I find sufficient entrance into a particular bond known as the relationship, my history as a heavily opinionated, talkative, self-proclaimed Grammar Nazi who consistently hits the mark pissing off individuals in possession of poor grammar/punctuation will tell most that I will, indeed, inform them of a change in relation status not involving the digital transfer of information. I don't oppose the social institution of the relationship. My understanding of the vast complexities prevents such interactions from occurring. Such factors contributing to said prevention have often included introverted adolescent behavior, the constant desire to remain one of the more highly educated individuals within the classroom environment as to appease moral and educational norms, and the rejection from members of the opposite gender.
Given my record of academia, these relationships never collaborated well with regularly set study habits. I digress, however, and call a vote to change subject.
No objections to the vote?
Motion agreed and shall sally forth to more entertaining endeavors!
I would recommend Rock of Ages as it both combines classic rock with the musical which, when studded with an all-star cast, must at least be valued for cheap, eight-dollar entertainment. 15 June brings about yet another attempt for Adam Sandler to devour his career with That's My Boy. Andy Samberg's purpose in this film must be nothing other than trying to hold up some integrity while Sandler makes an ass out of himself AGAIN. Cross-dressing and dumping Brooklyn Decker's ass for Jennifer Aniston wasn't enough? Now you have to use that f*cking annoying voice used so very sparingly throughout previous films? WHY?! I get it. Younger actors have risen to replace you, but retain some honor and go down peacefully. We all honestly thought Funny People meant the intended "bowing out" of the film industry, but now you want to make Tonka truck movies? F*ck that noise. Transformers was enough to see, Battleship made no other sense than a money grab, and Tonka trucks just has to be a last-ditch effort. Sandler, you WERE funny, hilarious, and a decent actor. BACK IN THE NINETIES! And early 2000s. Actors, just like milk, have expiration dates.
I really must put an end to these senseless rants of opinion.
On the bright side, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is nearly a week away. [Insert smiley emoticon now]
Or not. Anyway, the realism behind this film carries zero short-comings even to those not versed in Seth Grahame-Smith's narrative style. I do recommend reading the book. I do recommend seeing the movie. In fact, I can already award my rating of : Get the f*ck off the couch and see this damn movie! Of course, when I see the film from beginning to end, a review will follow as expected.
Count sheep tonight whilst imagining what DO you do with a BA in English such as #33- Assist the revival/teaching of poetry as a verifiable source of art.
Jonesy going to sleep.
Psych Your Mind!
Now, I'm not much for practical jokes. My sense of humor extends merely to just simple wit and occasional gems of hilarity. Sociology and psychology have always been subjects of high interest/intrigue. The behaviors of society as well as those of individuals serve to educate as well as entertain. I explain two interests of mine to introduce my first social experiment to be conducted over the frame of this week. As I fear for the security and validity of the experiment's statement and hypothesis, the general information as well as results will not be submitted until after the experiment has concluded a week from today, 19 June 2012 at approximately 1:20 AM. What I can assure you of is that the results might be very promising given every variable performs admirably.
Summer school at UNT has taken firm grasp of my attention span during the times I dedicate to a full focus on the required course material. This should indicate a slight hinderance in posting frequency as my hands will be typing more on the subject of ancient Greek tragedies and the role of justice instead of witty, insightful views into the entertainment industry. Oh, how I wish this to be my job. Please, IGN. Hire me.
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows should be out today according to commercial spots. I, for one, can't wait until Guy Ritchie does The Hound of Baskerville as the next installment.
I'm thoroughly burned out for such an incredibly late hour. While I begin conducting this social endeavor, please enjoy the following trailer brought to you by Quantic Dream regarding their latest game, Beyond: Two Souls. I want this game as much as I want The Last of Us.
I'm feeling lazy tonight, so here's #5- Go back through every book you read since Freshman year and underline every single prepositional phrase.
Summer school at UNT has taken firm grasp of my attention span during the times I dedicate to a full focus on the required course material. This should indicate a slight hinderance in posting frequency as my hands will be typing more on the subject of ancient Greek tragedies and the role of justice instead of witty, insightful views into the entertainment industry. Oh, how I wish this to be my job. Please, IGN. Hire me.
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows should be out today according to commercial spots. I, for one, can't wait until Guy Ritchie does The Hound of Baskerville as the next installment.
I'm thoroughly burned out for such an incredibly late hour. While I begin conducting this social endeavor, please enjoy the following trailer brought to you by Quantic Dream regarding their latest game, Beyond: Two Souls. I want this game as much as I want The Last of Us.
I'm feeling lazy tonight, so here's #5- Go back through every book you read since Freshman year and underline every single prepositional phrase.
08 June 2012
Early Bird Fail
I always prefer hitting up the cinema first thing in the morning. Beats the crowd and price to boot. Unless, however, you've mistaken the 3D early bird for a non-existent 2D showing. Nevertheless, I viewed the science fiction spectacle Ridley Scott intended for, what some may consider, to be a stand-alone prequel to Alien. I won't go into great detail as there are several spoiler potentials, but a certain scene does make skeptics out of some to believe future additions to Prometheus.
Anyway, review/critique time. Scott's direction sought to introduce viewers to a wild interpretation of the primordial soup theory or scientifically known as abiogenesis (the study of how biological life can arise from inorganic matter). See the film, grasp the slight understanding that is dealt.
Starring a few well-known actors/actresses such as Charlize Theron, Noomi Rapace, Michael Fassbender, Guy Pearce, and Idris Elba, the cast does well with the script given. Prometheus' stand-out performance is Fassbender and his role as the on-board artificial person (android). He, quite literally, steals the show granting us with an emotionless, non-human perspective who's been studying centuries of human history thus aiding his understanding of LV-223. I did, however, want to see more with Guy Pearce and Peter Weyland. Recently, I had the opportunity to view a certain trailer for the film revolving around Weyland's introduction to his intentions. This was beyond incredible, yet had no place in the movie. Some of what's said does show in a particular scene, but as an added bonus, here's the trailer:
Pearce puts his all into this role. From early films such as Momento to those tucked into a little nook such as The Time Machine, he is one of my favorite actors. I keep watching the most recent version of The Count of Monte Cristo and favor him in the villain's light. His dedication speaks through acting.
Back to Fassbender's "David" for a moment. We've seen Ian Holm's Ash, Lance Henriksen's Bishop, and Winona Ryder's Call, but David shines as the artificial person. This makes sense as the previous three came after thus giving Weyland-Utani more time to 'humanize' androids more efficiently. Of course, androids have always had it rough in the Aliens universe. David's no exception. All I could say was damn.
In regards to my couch method rating system, Prometheus proudly receives my highest accolade: "Get the f*ck off the couch and see this now".
In regards to what DO you do with a BA in English: #19- See if you can actually build a bridge with every single manufactured copy of The Bridge to Terabithia. Just don't watch the movie.
Jonesy signing off.
Anyway, review/critique time. Scott's direction sought to introduce viewers to a wild interpretation of the primordial soup theory or scientifically known as abiogenesis (the study of how biological life can arise from inorganic matter). See the film, grasp the slight understanding that is dealt.
Starring a few well-known actors/actresses such as Charlize Theron, Noomi Rapace, Michael Fassbender, Guy Pearce, and Idris Elba, the cast does well with the script given. Prometheus' stand-out performance is Fassbender and his role as the on-board artificial person (android). He, quite literally, steals the show granting us with an emotionless, non-human perspective who's been studying centuries of human history thus aiding his understanding of LV-223. I did, however, want to see more with Guy Pearce and Peter Weyland. Recently, I had the opportunity to view a certain trailer for the film revolving around Weyland's introduction to his intentions. This was beyond incredible, yet had no place in the movie. Some of what's said does show in a particular scene, but as an added bonus, here's the trailer:
Pearce puts his all into this role. From early films such as Momento to those tucked into a little nook such as The Time Machine, he is one of my favorite actors. I keep watching the most recent version of The Count of Monte Cristo and favor him in the villain's light. His dedication speaks through acting.
Back to Fassbender's "David" for a moment. We've seen Ian Holm's Ash, Lance Henriksen's Bishop, and Winona Ryder's Call, but David shines as the artificial person. This makes sense as the previous three came after thus giving Weyland-Utani more time to 'humanize' androids more efficiently. Of course, androids have always had it rough in the Aliens universe. David's no exception. All I could say was damn.
In regards to my couch method rating system, Prometheus proudly receives my highest accolade: "Get the f*ck off the couch and see this now".
In regards to what DO you do with a BA in English: #19- See if you can actually build a bridge with every single manufactured copy of The Bridge to Terabithia. Just don't watch the movie.
Jonesy signing off.
Honestly.....
...I'm just too damn tired. Four days since the last post. Technically Friday, 8 June 2012, we haven't seen a solitary act of opinionated journalism around these parts recently. These past three days have been physically and mentally exhausting. Now, I'm considered somewhat overly dramatic at times and most times can be pretty heavy. While three days stands nowhere near to that of thirty times as many, waking up earlier than usual by about two-three hours just sucks for any employed person. Who really wants to abandon the cold, comfortable confines of a memory foam topped mattress?
Would you?
How about you?
Perhaps you might?
The gentleman in the back with two bags of Doritos and a case of Mountain Dew? Wait, why would you know? You never leave the WOW-infested computer.
Yes, my intolerable detest of WOW persists even in my blogging attempts. Free online play brings the utmost enjoyment in a video game. Free vs monthly payments of your life, dignity, pride, and oh, yes, virginity.
Enough of this rant because I seem to excel at fashioning pointless, one-sided banter over subjects far too meaningless. Onward, my fellow cohorts in internet shenanigans!
Prometheus finally hits theatres with a midnight launch. Sadly, I worked and attended class; therefore, my resolve pretty shot itself down despite consuming a N0S energy drink that tasted like horse piss mixed with artificial citrus flavors. I will, however, catch the early showing at 10:20 AM central standard. Expect my couch rating in the post later today or Saturday. Can Ridley Scott make his grand re-entrance into his beloved sci-fi genre? Stay tuned, comrades!
In other news, I just finished Killzone 3 about half an hour ago. They ended the game that way. Yeah, that way for all you Guerilla Studios fans out there. Why and how that prick's still alive confounds/intrigues me. I mean, the freaking big-ass boom-boom wasn't enough?! Dish out the game and I'll dish out the green, Guerilla.
Oh, and for all you Nintendo fanboys, yes. It comes in black. Supposedly arriving on your shelves this holiday season, Nintendo's fully HD, 1080p, eight-generation console will come in a black finish. As for a price, not so much yet. E3 has tossed out information like t-shirt cannons at a rock concert. Xbox 720? Playstation 4? Hell, I hope not. Please, don't take my money away now. I have collector's editions pre-ordered.
Expect the Wii U to ship either in time for Christmas or early first quarter 2013. Nintendo would be insane not releasing it for the holidays. Critical marketing failure right there. U's launch titles look like your average Nintendo fare with a little hey-hey tossed in like Arkham City: Armored Edition, Mass Effect 3, Rayman, and possibly a Battlefield title.
The Last of Us looks incredible as does Beyond: Two Souls. Naughty Dog comes back after Nathan Drake with a post-apocalyptic joy-ride while Quantic Dream of Heavy Rain fame takes Ellen Page as the primary protagonist. Yes and yes, wrap them up and put a bow on the box.
Don't shy away this holiday season. 'Tis the definitive gaming season for all gamers to share the joy of fragging with kindness. Just remember the golden rule: Frag not, lest ye be fragged.
Aaaaaaaaaand, what DO you do with a BA in English? How the hell should I know? I'm still an undergraduate! Alright, fine. Try #9- conduct a tour of the Globe Theatre, but in Shakespearean English. It's cryptic and fun!
Jonesy signing off.
Would you?
How about you?
Perhaps you might?
The gentleman in the back with two bags of Doritos and a case of Mountain Dew? Wait, why would you know? You never leave the WOW-infested computer.
Yes, my intolerable detest of WOW persists even in my blogging attempts. Free online play brings the utmost enjoyment in a video game. Free vs monthly payments of your life, dignity, pride, and oh, yes, virginity.
Enough of this rant because I seem to excel at fashioning pointless, one-sided banter over subjects far too meaningless. Onward, my fellow cohorts in internet shenanigans!
Prometheus finally hits theatres with a midnight launch. Sadly, I worked and attended class; therefore, my resolve pretty shot itself down despite consuming a N0S energy drink that tasted like horse piss mixed with artificial citrus flavors. I will, however, catch the early showing at 10:20 AM central standard. Expect my couch rating in the post later today or Saturday. Can Ridley Scott make his grand re-entrance into his beloved sci-fi genre? Stay tuned, comrades!
In other news, I just finished Killzone 3 about half an hour ago. They ended the game that way. Yeah, that way for all you Guerilla Studios fans out there. Why and how that prick's still alive confounds/intrigues me. I mean, the freaking big-ass boom-boom wasn't enough?! Dish out the game and I'll dish out the green, Guerilla.
Oh, and for all you Nintendo fanboys, yes. It comes in black. Supposedly arriving on your shelves this holiday season, Nintendo's fully HD, 1080p, eight-generation console will come in a black finish. As for a price, not so much yet. E3 has tossed out information like t-shirt cannons at a rock concert. Xbox 720? Playstation 4? Hell, I hope not. Please, don't take my money away now. I have collector's editions pre-ordered.
Expect the Wii U to ship either in time for Christmas or early first quarter 2013. Nintendo would be insane not releasing it for the holidays. Critical marketing failure right there. U's launch titles look like your average Nintendo fare with a little hey-hey tossed in like Arkham City: Armored Edition, Mass Effect 3, Rayman, and possibly a Battlefield title.
The Last of Us looks incredible as does Beyond: Two Souls. Naughty Dog comes back after Nathan Drake with a post-apocalyptic joy-ride while Quantic Dream of Heavy Rain fame takes Ellen Page as the primary protagonist. Yes and yes, wrap them up and put a bow on the box.
Don't shy away this holiday season. 'Tis the definitive gaming season for all gamers to share the joy of fragging with kindness. Just remember the golden rule: Frag not, lest ye be fragged.
Aaaaaaaaaand, what DO you do with a BA in English? How the hell should I know? I'm still an undergraduate! Alright, fine. Try #9- conduct a tour of the Globe Theatre, but in Shakespearean English. It's cryptic and fun!
Jonesy signing off.
04 June 2012
Solemn Low-Five
Today has, literally, been a tragedy of a day. From waking up to as I type this, I've led one sad, tragic, monotonous day.
1) Slept through the alarm due to what I believe was another nightmare
2) Saw Snow White and the Huntsman which was dark, gritty, eerie, violent, and while not entirely tragic, it definitely was a different look upon the classic Disney version
3) Started my class over classical Greek tragedies
4) Failed to overcome one of my greatest fears: interacting with a woman with whom I had the worst falling out with
5) Subjected myself to deliberate, intentional harm
Hell of a Monday. However, let's not focus on me, but rather the new face on a Disney classic. Snow White and the Huntsman, starring Kristen Stewart as the title character, Chris Hemsworth as the second title character, and Charlize Theron as the evil queen. Acting from all three could have been slightly better, but only by the smallest amount. Sam Claflin, who you will recognize from On Stranger Tides adopts the persona as the noble Prince William, the love interest of Snow White. Other notable actors such as Bob Hoskins, Nick Frost, Ray Winstone, Ian McShane, and Toby Jones play a handful of the seven dwarves. Their screen-time was, I believe, a shortage. These characters were pivotal in the animated version and yet I found myself wanting to see more from their purpose in the film. At a running time of roughly 127 minutes, I can understand cutting away from the dwarves to focus on the main story of disposing the queen Ravenna (Theron).
The take on the magic mirror was especially brilliant and slightly eerie from the traditional "face-in-the-mirror". Overall, I can say this with ease, Kristen Stewart has successfully surpassed the Twilight curse. Robert Pattinson already has (as mentioned before) with Water for Elephants. Like I said, Taylor Lautner failed.
In the pursuit of continuing my couch method rating system, I award Snow White and the Huntsman a score of "Sit around thinking about it for a moment, then get off the couch and see it".
Now, as for what DO you do with a BA in English: #72- Read an account of a war veteran and imagine if your life can be any worse. Definitely won't be talking about anxiety or depression after reading about double amputations from artillery fire.
Jonesy signing off.
1) Slept through the alarm due to what I believe was another nightmare
2) Saw Snow White and the Huntsman which was dark, gritty, eerie, violent, and while not entirely tragic, it definitely was a different look upon the classic Disney version
3) Started my class over classical Greek tragedies
4) Failed to overcome one of my greatest fears: interacting with a woman with whom I had the worst falling out with
5) Subjected myself to deliberate, intentional harm
Hell of a Monday. However, let's not focus on me, but rather the new face on a Disney classic. Snow White and the Huntsman, starring Kristen Stewart as the title character, Chris Hemsworth as the second title character, and Charlize Theron as the evil queen. Acting from all three could have been slightly better, but only by the smallest amount. Sam Claflin, who you will recognize from On Stranger Tides adopts the persona as the noble Prince William, the love interest of Snow White. Other notable actors such as Bob Hoskins, Nick Frost, Ray Winstone, Ian McShane, and Toby Jones play a handful of the seven dwarves. Their screen-time was, I believe, a shortage. These characters were pivotal in the animated version and yet I found myself wanting to see more from their purpose in the film. At a running time of roughly 127 minutes, I can understand cutting away from the dwarves to focus on the main story of disposing the queen Ravenna (Theron).
The take on the magic mirror was especially brilliant and slightly eerie from the traditional "face-in-the-mirror". Overall, I can say this with ease, Kristen Stewart has successfully surpassed the Twilight curse. Robert Pattinson already has (as mentioned before) with Water for Elephants. Like I said, Taylor Lautner failed.
In the pursuit of continuing my couch method rating system, I award Snow White and the Huntsman a score of "Sit around thinking about it for a moment, then get off the couch and see it".
Now, as for what DO you do with a BA in English: #72- Read an account of a war veteran and imagine if your life can be any worse. Definitely won't be talking about anxiety or depression after reading about double amputations from artillery fire.
Jonesy signing off.
03 June 2012
Sigh.....
I really don't care if I used one too many ellipses in the title. My writing instructor this past semester demanded we hold an entire discussion over the subject for half the damned class. Lesson learned?
Huh? What the f*ck are ellipses? Those little dots you occasionally put at the end of a sentence or word to either represent mystery, suspense, anticipation, or a prolonged thought. That remains my definition. Lesson unlearned.
Work has recently become a deep thorn in my side. Usual results from slaving away at an unidentified hell-hole produce massive amounts of fatigue which, as you can guess, hinder the frequency of postings from appearing on a certain unread or (if my optimism ever kicks in) slightly read blog. Serving as a mini-rant, I dislike my current employ. Should unnamed managers or potential employers ever see this particular entry, be honest with yourself. Place yourself in the shoes of a near-college graduate who only wants a job where pain isn't the number one sensation coursing throughout his body. I listen to unnamed customers constantly bitch, moan, and complain about certain return policies or fine-print material they neglected to examine. I am constantly forced to witness the verbal demise of a language so desperately in need of rescue (English). Pardon me, ma'am, but the correct phrase would be "The device I currently possess DOES NOT work" and, most certainly, not "It don't work no more". You do not say "I didn't break nothing on it. It just breaked". Notice the use of double negatives and improper usage of the past tense. Elementary grammar! ELEMENTARY! Public education was provided free of charge for a reason.
Or, this entire paragraph can be summarized with "Sigh....."
Current generation audiences, please, please, please read to your kids. Read to your grandchildren. If you're lucky enough, read to your great-grandchildren. Involve the youth with literature early on and I guarantee they will be successful. Read funny stories, read Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Plato, Aristotle, Hemingway, Grahame-Smith, Austen, Dostoevsky, Hawthorne, Shelley, Burns, I don't care! Just, for the love of the human race, read until your eyes bleed like I have! Okay, not really, but a commendable amount, at the least.
So, with that rant and the bleeding eyes, I leave you with another dose of what DO you do with a BA in English. #122- Go to your local library and sign up for summer reading programs. Help a kid read and help yourself learn.
Jonesy signing off.
Huh? What the f*ck are ellipses? Those little dots you occasionally put at the end of a sentence or word to either represent mystery, suspense, anticipation, or a prolonged thought. That remains my definition. Lesson unlearned.
Work has recently become a deep thorn in my side. Usual results from slaving away at an unidentified hell-hole produce massive amounts of fatigue which, as you can guess, hinder the frequency of postings from appearing on a certain unread or (if my optimism ever kicks in) slightly read blog. Serving as a mini-rant, I dislike my current employ. Should unnamed managers or potential employers ever see this particular entry, be honest with yourself. Place yourself in the shoes of a near-college graduate who only wants a job where pain isn't the number one sensation coursing throughout his body. I listen to unnamed customers constantly bitch, moan, and complain about certain return policies or fine-print material they neglected to examine. I am constantly forced to witness the verbal demise of a language so desperately in need of rescue (English). Pardon me, ma'am, but the correct phrase would be "The device I currently possess DOES NOT work" and, most certainly, not "It don't work no more". You do not say "I didn't break nothing on it. It just breaked". Notice the use of double negatives and improper usage of the past tense. Elementary grammar! ELEMENTARY! Public education was provided free of charge for a reason.
Or, this entire paragraph can be summarized with "Sigh....."
Current generation audiences, please, please, please read to your kids. Read to your grandchildren. If you're lucky enough, read to your great-grandchildren. Involve the youth with literature early on and I guarantee they will be successful. Read funny stories, read Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Plato, Aristotle, Hemingway, Grahame-Smith, Austen, Dostoevsky, Hawthorne, Shelley, Burns, I don't care! Just, for the love of the human race, read until your eyes bleed like I have! Okay, not really, but a commendable amount, at the least.
So, with that rant and the bleeding eyes, I leave you with another dose of what DO you do with a BA in English. #122- Go to your local library and sign up for summer reading programs. Help a kid read and help yourself learn.
Jonesy signing off.
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